My thoughts on New Year's Resolutions
According to a source cited in the Forbes article below, as high as 80% of people will fail to achieve their New Year’s resolutions they set out to accomplish this year. That is an astounding number, but one that I feel no one is truly shocked by. My true opinion on New Year’s Resolutions is that they are ineffective, and carry little meaning due to the massive societal norm that is put on them every January. I do believe that there are also several other factors that play into why many people’s resolutions fall short of success.
Do I believe that resolutions are inherently bad, and can not be successful? No.
The first reason that I think many resolutioners do not find success is related to the fact that in order to be successful there must be a meaningful “Why” behind wanting to create that change. I believe part of what plays into the ineffectiveness of resolutions is the fact that they are instigated by our society. Every year when January rolls around, many people will begin thinking about resolutions simply because those around them are. This sets up a scenario where the resolution one might commit to lacks conviction. When that person hits a challenge with that resolution the “Why” they come back to is, “because everyone else was making resolutions.”
I can look at a personal example where I identified this situation.
Last New Year, I was coming into the year as the most successful Trainer at the biggest gym here in Fort Collins, Colorado. As the year began I ended up setting some lofty business/financial goals for myself. The only problem was that I did not instigate these goals. My boss did. I let my bosses excitement of what a bigger and better year looked like, be the motivating factor in creating a goal to pursue. It had very little to do with me saying “I want to achieve this in my training business through the gym.”
As the year went on, I was successful for a few months in pursuit of my goals. However, about 4 months into the year, I began to struggle with maintaining my motivation to be at the gym, and execute at the level I always had. I battled with this situation for another 3 months, all the while slowly dropping off in reaching my goals.
Finally I made the connection that this goal did not mean anything to me. I had been pursuing a goal that external pressures had created for me, not a goal that I chose because it lit me up INTERNALLY! When I reached this point last year, I decided to build my own coaching business and step into all that entails.
To this day, as we begin 2023, I have not achieved the financial goals I set out to last year. However, in the last year I did realize that the ONLY way I will do that moving forward, is by pursuing it through a means that I am connected to. Through a means that I find deep meaning in. If I am not connected to it, the goal(s) will not be achieved.
I have worked with many people over the years who come into the gym in January, and set out to accomplish goals or resolutions. I can say with confidence that the people that did not succeed, or stay committed to their goals and process were the people who had external “Why’s.” The person who was trying to lose weight because their doctor said they needed to for their health was rarely (if ever) as successful as the person who wanted to lose weight so they could play with their kids/grandkids again!
I will also attach an article here from the American Psychological Association, that helps discuss approaches to make your New Year’s Resolutions count! That being said, I think that the most important advice I would share as a coach is to make a deep connection with the “Why” behind the change you want to create.
Another reason why I think resolutions can set people up for failure, is due to the natural expectation of “perfection” that can come along with them! We say to ourselves, that as of January 1st we will not do (x, y, or z) and step into the New Year saying we will never look back.
The hard part is that this is simply not the way real life, or the human brain works. Some people will fall off their resolution wagon at the first mistake or mess up because they expected perfection from themselves. As you step into 2023, I challenge you to go after your goals/resolutions with conviction, while also practicing having grace for yourself.
When you make the inevitable mistake that does not align with you achieving your goals, do not take yourself out of the race. Reflect on the situation, and how it happened! Learn from this situation, and apply the lesson(s) moving forward so you are less likely to make the same mistake again! This is spoken about in the article from Mandal which I have cited below, which gives the excellent reminder that “Every day is a new day.”
So, as you continue to head into 2023, and work on goals, resolutions, or changes that you believe will have a positive impact on your Wellness, I would challenge you to reflect on why you created those goals, and ensure there is a foundation strong enough to support you in succeeding as challenges come your way this year! I would also encourage you to be kind with yourself as you work so hard to create a positive impact on your own Wellness! You have BIG reasons for taking on the goals you have for 2023, and you WILL be successful! That being said, it will not happen by accident because you put a few words on paper as a “Resolution.” You will have to be present and active in your process, and go after your vision of 2023 with confidence! YOU’VE GOT THIS!
Sources:
Mandal S. How to make your new year’s resolutions work? Soc Behav Res Pract Open J. 2020; 4(2): 28-29. doi: 10.17140/SBRPOJ-4-119
